_"That guy ahead is driving like a lunatic!" squeals my passenger. "Pass him!"
"You do not pass crazy,"I tell him.
"Every car within 100 feet of us
is being driven by a serial killer,
speeding to strangle somebody we will read about tomorrow."
"That is your belief?" he asks.
"My conviction. Especially in summer."
This is my absolute road rule:
All cars within sight
are driven by crazy people.
"Just ahead, we will stop for coffee and donuts.
This will give the lunatic time
to get to where he's going
and kill some unsuspecting soul."
"But it will not be us," agrees my pal.
"The serial killer will be sated," I nod.
Leave time for Netflix to book him.
And we will be fully donut'ed."
"Are you a saint?" he wonders.
Shucks.
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